The Filter You Carry Is Distorting Every Person in Front of YouDeirdre loved her mother. Could not stand her. She said "I love her but I can't stand being around her."
I told her she needed to make peace with her mother in her mind. She started working on the memories. How she felt about them, what her mother did, all of it. She did the work. Then she came back and said the weirdest thing was happening. Her mother was acting like she had sessions. Like she was changing. I told her: your mother is not changing. Your glasses are being updated. When you hold a filter about someone built from old memories and old pain, you are not seeing that person. You are seeing your distorted version of them. And you are acting toward them through that distortion. Which shapes how they respond to you. Which confirms what you already believed. The moment you change how you hold someone in your mind, you stop activating the old dynamic. The relationship shifts. Not because they changed. Because the filter did. This is one of the most important things I can say about family relationships. The person in front of you today is being seen through everything you built about them in your head. Update the glasses and you see a different person. If you are ready to do this work directly, a private session with me is where it happens. Book a session here: linktr.ee/robertgenesmith 🎙️ Full episode 42 of The Robert Gene Experience is on Spotify and YouTube now. #robertgene #fastereft #RelationshipPatterns #EmotionalHealing #InternalChange
Apr 11, 2026
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